You Have to Love Yourself in Order to Heal

Love myself? When I was trying to heal all my aches and pains of chronic illness this was mentioned in every book I read. Love myself, feel worthy, have self-confidence. This was a tough one because I thought of myself as an okay person -- I have 2 young children I love and take care of, a husband of ten years that I love deeply, friends that I am very open with-- but did I LOVE myself? I have always been hard on myself and a perfectionist so this was a difficult place for me to go.

I was ill, I had aches and pains and was not living up to what I wanted to be. I felt very sad about my health and all the extra work it was costing my husband, mom and children. I was very focused on what I was NOT instead of what I was. I started with listing things I was proud of myself for. I am a good listener, I love to write, I LOVE to dance, I help and reach out to my friends, my kids tell me what a good mom I am and shower me with hugs, I have a LOVING relationship with my husband that just grows stronger every year, I went to a prestigious high school and consider myself smart and love to read, I am good with the computer and games, I am a good cook... wow maybe I'm not so bad after all!

If you don't celebrate and appreciate the things you are good at you are telling your subconscious you are not worthy of healing or of love. By concentrating on the bad and what you don't have you are inviting it to get even worse. It is not easy to change negative thoughts over night but it is a lot easier than it would seem to be. Once you start concentrating on the good in you -- you will feel your self confidence rise. Once you feel your confidence rise you will feel like nothing can stand in your way.

Let go of the past. Forgive yourself for things that happened before. Haven't you spent enough time worrying and focusing on them? It's time to move forward and to appreciate who you are today and what you will make of yourself and your future.

Do more of what you are confident that you can do well. Do you make your friends laugh? Call one and make their day. Can you cook? Make a nice meal and savor it. Do you enjoy reading? Read an article or book on something you have always wanted to learn about. Can you dance or sing? Turn up the music loud and dance and/or sing! Do your kids love when you read to them? Take extra time reading the them and watch their smiles. Are you good at a certain game/crosswords/sudoku? Play it and celebrate that you do it so well. Nurture what you love about yourself. Take pride and joy in what you love about yourself. Your love and confidence will shine through and you will be attracting other people to love you as well.